"You need to talk to him NOW and make his stop yelling cat calls and whistling at women out the front door of the church."
Such was the greeting that began my Sunday morning.
I set aside the sermon notes and put the prayers on hold so I could have a talk with him. The talk included the requested directives.
From there we had a talk about why this behavior was bad. The top two reasons were 1.) it had the opposite effect of the women he was interested in; and 2.) it made the church look bad in a scary way.
Since I had a captive audience and knew I wouldn't get to that last review of my sermon notes anyway, he and I spent some time coming up with better plans. We thought of ways he might be able to make himself more attractive to women. These included being kind and respectful to all women, whether he was particularly interested in them or not, and to work on being friends with people rather than simply seeking out physical relationships.
It was a good talk, at least for me. I needed to hear it because of the way I sometimes approach evangelism.
Sometimes the people I'm most interested in as potential members of the church are people who come with lots of skills, lots of energy, and who already have their lives put together pretty well. Leadership potential is especially attractive.
I've come to learn, though, that many of the popular methods used by churches today aren't very effective in reaching them. Even ones that seem kind and loving "on paper" seem manipulative to the person on the receiving end. These methods and strategies often have the opposite of the intended effect and make the church look bad in a scary kind of way.
Jesus showed kindness and respect to all people no matter who they were. He became known as a friend of "sinners" while still being invited to dinner at the home of "respectable" people. He built friendships with and provided ministry to people who would become disciples as well as those who would betray Him.
Some people came to see Jesus just for the show or the healing or the free bread & fish. But some received much more than they expected and then used what they had been given as raw materials for building God's Kingdom.
Evangelism, like human love, has its ups and downs and and twists and turns. It has no guarantees. Perhaps if I became more motivated by Jesus' love than my personal desires for people to join the church, some might respond out of dignity and curiosity rather than being repelled by my bad behavior.
Be they Zealots or tax collectors or fishermen, lifelong disciples or here just for the show or healing or free bread, all are loved by a God who is calling their names. May I help them hear that calling rather than drown it out with my own whistle.
Jesus, help me see as You see, serve as You serve, love as You love.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Friday, November 19, 2010
Coats
"Just take these," she said as she hoisted four men's coats into my hands. She had turned her head, seeming both to not want to watch as she let go of the garments and not wanting me to notice the puffiness of her eyes that were holding back the remaining tears.
I knew the coats had come at a great cost. I had seen them before. They were hanging in her house right where her husband had left them. In the years since his passing they had been reminders of his presence, reminders of the blessing she'd lost.
But cold came early that fall. And when she saw the cardboard sign being held by the shivering hands of a homeless man she knew was my friend she had to do something.
The moment when grief for what was lost is overtaken by grief for those who never had something to begin with puts us in a position of challenge. And when we boldly, painfully choose to respond by taking the blessings from our past and using them to heal the present the Spirit can't seem to help but move.
I took those coats to four very different men: tall, short, stout, lean. I said to each, "I don't know if this will fit; it might be a too _____________ (short, long, small, bulky) but try it on and we'll see."
And though these men would need to shop in different sections of stores to find well-fitting clothing, each coat appeared as if custom tailored for that individual. Warm memories of blessings past, baptized by tears, transformed into blessings of warmth against today's cold winds.
Lord, help me know Your presence in all attempts to serve You.
I knew the coats had come at a great cost. I had seen them before. They were hanging in her house right where her husband had left them. In the years since his passing they had been reminders of his presence, reminders of the blessing she'd lost.
But cold came early that fall. And when she saw the cardboard sign being held by the shivering hands of a homeless man she knew was my friend she had to do something.
The moment when grief for what was lost is overtaken by grief for those who never had something to begin with puts us in a position of challenge. And when we boldly, painfully choose to respond by taking the blessings from our past and using them to heal the present the Spirit can't seem to help but move.
I took those coats to four very different men: tall, short, stout, lean. I said to each, "I don't know if this will fit; it might be a too _____________ (short, long, small, bulky) but try it on and we'll see."
And though these men would need to shop in different sections of stores to find well-fitting clothing, each coat appeared as if custom tailored for that individual. Warm memories of blessings past, baptized by tears, transformed into blessings of warmth against today's cold winds.
Lord, help me know Your presence in all attempts to serve You.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Journey
His South Carolina accent told me he wasn't from around here even before he informed me of such. He had missed his south-bound bus home and was looking for a way to get back on the road. He hadn't eaten for a couple of days, either.
After he devoured the warmed-up can of ravioli I'd microwaved, he asked if I could give him the small amount of money needed to change his bus ticket to the one leaving later that night. Cash is something I know enough not to do, so I came up with some other viable options for him.
I offered to go to the bus station to change the ticket and pay small amount with my credit card to get him home.
That was not acceptable to him because he said it was asking too much of me.
I offered to connect him with some emergency services that would help him get home.
That was not acceptable to him because he said those services were for people with much bigger problems than his.
I offered to help him contact relatives in South Carolina so they could get him a ticket.
That was not acceptable to him because he said it would create too much work and bother for them.
I returned to my first offer and directed him to my van so he and I could drive the few blocks back to the bus station where he could catch his bus.
That was not acceptable to him. He had a solution in mind, that being him receiving a few dollars so he could change the ticket himself. Nothing else would be acceptable.
I asked him if he wanted to go back to South Carolina.
"Yes!" he said, exasperated and a bit angry that I couldn't seem to grasp this basic concept. I reviewed his options.
He came back with a plan for me to go to an ATM to get money to give him so he could change his ticket.
I said no. He started crying.
"I just want to get home. I just need to get home!"
He then got up, walked out of the church, and disappeared into the night.
Over the next couple of days I saw him walking the streets, despondent, angry, frustrated, and clutching an expired bus ticket in his left hand.
I wish I knew how to not be like this guy. I don't always know how to take help from people or from God, especially if I've been traveling alone for a while. I can spend so much time and energy designing plans and solutions that I limit the range of what help is acceptable. I can only see one possible way home.
And when my plans were generated in a state of hunger, especially in emotional or spiritual hunger, warmed-up canned responses from those around me don't offer enough strength and clarity for me to see any differently.
I know that being open to plans beyond what I can conceive is where I can experience miraculous grace. I mean, if Moses had spend his whole day demanding that God build a bridge he would not have heard the call to raise his staff and have an unexpected path home open up for him and his people.
But knowing and acting on that knowledge are two different things. Trust is a key element in moving to action. When I'm feeling out of place in a world that's unresponsive to my solutions, my ability to trust falls. My blinders make me blind.
What if I had spent a few more minutes with the South Carolinian man, empathizing with his emotions and state of mind rather that jumping straight to alternative solutions? Maybe we both could have realized that his unstated goal was to find some dignity and worth. He might have been more open to plans different than his own that would have taken him home had we spent some time developing basic trust.
Perhaps if I can recognize when I'm fixated on a single solution that I need to listen and trust God and those He has placed in my path. I have to remember that He wants me to get me back to the journey He's sent me on and that He has a way beyond what I can see.
Lord, remind me that my thoughts are not Your thoughts and my ways are not Your ways. Let me journey in trust.
After he devoured the warmed-up can of ravioli I'd microwaved, he asked if I could give him the small amount of money needed to change his bus ticket to the one leaving later that night. Cash is something I know enough not to do, so I came up with some other viable options for him.
I offered to go to the bus station to change the ticket and pay small amount with my credit card to get him home.
That was not acceptable to him because he said it was asking too much of me.
I offered to connect him with some emergency services that would help him get home.
That was not acceptable to him because he said those services were for people with much bigger problems than his.
I offered to help him contact relatives in South Carolina so they could get him a ticket.
That was not acceptable to him because he said it would create too much work and bother for them.
I returned to my first offer and directed him to my van so he and I could drive the few blocks back to the bus station where he could catch his bus.
That was not acceptable to him. He had a solution in mind, that being him receiving a few dollars so he could change the ticket himself. Nothing else would be acceptable.
I asked him if he wanted to go back to South Carolina.
"Yes!" he said, exasperated and a bit angry that I couldn't seem to grasp this basic concept. I reviewed his options.
He came back with a plan for me to go to an ATM to get money to give him so he could change his ticket.
I said no. He started crying.
"I just want to get home. I just need to get home!"
He then got up, walked out of the church, and disappeared into the night.
Over the next couple of days I saw him walking the streets, despondent, angry, frustrated, and clutching an expired bus ticket in his left hand.
I wish I knew how to not be like this guy. I don't always know how to take help from people or from God, especially if I've been traveling alone for a while. I can spend so much time and energy designing plans and solutions that I limit the range of what help is acceptable. I can only see one possible way home.
And when my plans were generated in a state of hunger, especially in emotional or spiritual hunger, warmed-up canned responses from those around me don't offer enough strength and clarity for me to see any differently.
I know that being open to plans beyond what I can conceive is where I can experience miraculous grace. I mean, if Moses had spend his whole day demanding that God build a bridge he would not have heard the call to raise his staff and have an unexpected path home open up for him and his people.
But knowing and acting on that knowledge are two different things. Trust is a key element in moving to action. When I'm feeling out of place in a world that's unresponsive to my solutions, my ability to trust falls. My blinders make me blind.
What if I had spent a few more minutes with the South Carolinian man, empathizing with his emotions and state of mind rather that jumping straight to alternative solutions? Maybe we both could have realized that his unstated goal was to find some dignity and worth. He might have been more open to plans different than his own that would have taken him home had we spent some time developing basic trust.
Perhaps if I can recognize when I'm fixated on a single solution that I need to listen and trust God and those He has placed in my path. I have to remember that He wants me to get me back to the journey He's sent me on and that He has a way beyond what I can see.
Lord, remind me that my thoughts are not Your thoughts and my ways are not Your ways. Let me journey in trust.
Saturday, November 6, 2010
Red
I was relieved when he came into church that night wearing a new red shirt. I'd never seen him wear red before nor have I seen him in red since. I hadn't asked him to do so but it was exactly what he needed to wear.
Turn the clock back about two and a half hours when a kid sitting on the floor of the church yelled, "Ouch!"
I went over to the kid to see what was wrong.
"It's hot!" he said, pointing to the font.
It was the first time I'd used the heater on the font and was unsure of exactly how well it worked. Now the metal sides of the font were painfully hot to the touch.
This was not good.
So, we unplugged the heater and removed the table we'd used as a lid in hopes that the water would cool before the service.
Only then did we learn that the tabletop has once been painted red. The steamy water had leached all the pigments out of it.
Yes, that's right. We had bright red scalding hot water in the font with no way to drain and refill it in time for the service.
So during the time between the services I did all I could think to do. I opened the front door to let the January air into the building in hopes of cooling things down. I set my sermon aside and frantically flipped through the Bible seeing if I could somehow have a message that involved either the Red Sea or being "baptized in the blood" or both.
But with his coming to church in a red shirt and the water cooling off to that of bathwater I was able to switch back to the sermon I had prepared in advance.
During that message each person was given a hard, crumbling piece of clay. They then got to quickly dip their clay into a bowl of water and continue working with it. The newly pliable clay was now able to be shaped and molded into something it couldn't have been before.
I remembered my own baptism and my commitment to letting the Potter mold this clay into something He wants. And I thought of my unnecessarily frantic state that afternoon as I had tried to make up for my own ignorance and error.
I realized (for the millionth time) that He still had a lot of molding to do and that I needed to step back and let Him reshape me to serve peacefully in the circumstances I find myself.
Even my panic had been used by Him to let me be shaped in His hands. For He granted me knowledge in how to better use the font's heater and faith in trusting that as I continue to get things wrong He'll surprise us all in bringing about His work.
Be it the parting of the Red Sea or a baptism candidate in a red tee God continues to use the strangest of circumstances in forming his people into a growing vessel for faith and trust. May the waters of my baptism continue to soak in deeply that I might be easily shaped in His hands.
Melt me. Mold me. Fill me. Use me. Spirit of the Living God, fall afresh on me.
Turn the clock back about two and a half hours when a kid sitting on the floor of the church yelled, "Ouch!"
I went over to the kid to see what was wrong.
"It's hot!" he said, pointing to the font.
It was the first time I'd used the heater on the font and was unsure of exactly how well it worked. Now the metal sides of the font were painfully hot to the touch.
This was not good.
So, we unplugged the heater and removed the table we'd used as a lid in hopes that the water would cool before the service.
Only then did we learn that the tabletop has once been painted red. The steamy water had leached all the pigments out of it.
Yes, that's right. We had bright red scalding hot water in the font with no way to drain and refill it in time for the service.
So during the time between the services I did all I could think to do. I opened the front door to let the January air into the building in hopes of cooling things down. I set my sermon aside and frantically flipped through the Bible seeing if I could somehow have a message that involved either the Red Sea or being "baptized in the blood" or both.
But with his coming to church in a red shirt and the water cooling off to that of bathwater I was able to switch back to the sermon I had prepared in advance.
During that message each person was given a hard, crumbling piece of clay. They then got to quickly dip their clay into a bowl of water and continue working with it. The newly pliable clay was now able to be shaped and molded into something it couldn't have been before.
I remembered my own baptism and my commitment to letting the Potter mold this clay into something He wants. And I thought of my unnecessarily frantic state that afternoon as I had tried to make up for my own ignorance and error.
I realized (for the millionth time) that He still had a lot of molding to do and that I needed to step back and let Him reshape me to serve peacefully in the circumstances I find myself.
Even my panic had been used by Him to let me be shaped in His hands. For He granted me knowledge in how to better use the font's heater and faith in trusting that as I continue to get things wrong He'll surprise us all in bringing about His work.
Be it the parting of the Red Sea or a baptism candidate in a red tee God continues to use the strangest of circumstances in forming his people into a growing vessel for faith and trust. May the waters of my baptism continue to soak in deeply that I might be easily shaped in His hands.
Melt me. Mold me. Fill me. Use me. Spirit of the Living God, fall afresh on me.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Cause
The gold, low-riding, tricked out Cadillac pulled up in front of the school. Both front doors opened and two massive young men got out of the front seat simultaneously. Each was adorned in high-end gang apparel and a variety of gold jewelry. The tough anger on their faces caused everyone to pause.
One opened the back door of the car while the other reached his hand inside to assist the lady in exiting the vehicle.
She had a fresh hairdo and was dressed to the nines. As she emerged it was clear that both men were rendered helpless by the mesmerizing power she held over them.
The sheer delight on her face captivated the rest of us as she slowly walked into the school with one man on each arm. The man on her left let go only long enough to open the school door. He then took her frail hand as she laboriously navigated the step up and in.
As they waited with her in line to vote, she started a conversation with a couple of her friends who had gotten to the polls a few minutes before her. The two friends said they would wait for her afterward. With great dignity, they hobbled along with their canes toward a few chairs along the wall.
The three women sat together and visited quietly while keeping an eye out as for who had made it to the polls. Just a glance into their eyes told quite a story.
For those eyes had seen lynchings. And those feet that now needed a cane had marched. The arms that had been supported to reach the polls had been linked together in solidarity in standing for justice. They'd sat at the lunch counters and in the front of the bus. They knew what fire hoses and police dogs and night sticks could do. That day they remembered what they had been through and marked some of the fruits of their sufferings.
The men who had driven her hadn't voted. They loitered in a corner. If they even hinted at being impatient or wanting get back to their other dealings, one brief look shot across the room from her put an immediate end to it.
When I look at my role in building His kingdom of righteousness, peace, and joy, I'd like to say that I'm like one of those elderly women. Truthfully, though, I must confess my solidarity is more often with the men who were with her.
I don't clearly see or understand or begin to appreciate the sacrifices and suffering that have made it possible to fulfill my calling in His work. Be it the saints of old or people who currently give beyond their means to make sure that I have a salary, it's often lost on me.
Plus I know that there are material and emotional benefits if I deal only in the portions of the Gospel that are the opiate of the masses rather than getting fully engaged in the cause of Peaceable Kingdom. It's easier to surround myself with material possessions that show my status to others (though mostly to convince myself of my own worth) rather than to go through the hardships it takes to bring worth and dignity and justice to others.
And if I can't get my head and heart lined up around these things, how can I possibly even begin to pretend to understand the cross?
But once in a while I hear the Story again. And as I do I'm reminded that His work is not just something from the past or for the future but is for the here and now.
So I have a choice each day. I can treat Him with respect and honor. It may be a bit inconvenient and I might get impatient but for it I'll be blessed. Or, I can pay the price of joining with Him in the task of building His kingdom in the here and now. The cause is His. The choice is mine.
Your cause be mine, great Lord divine.
Your aim be my ambition:
For wasted is my greatest strength
Unless it find expression
In love the gives itself away,
In life responsive to obey
The terms of Your commission. (Bryan Jeffery Leach)
One opened the back door of the car while the other reached his hand inside to assist the lady in exiting the vehicle.
She had a fresh hairdo and was dressed to the nines. As she emerged it was clear that both men were rendered helpless by the mesmerizing power she held over them.
The sheer delight on her face captivated the rest of us as she slowly walked into the school with one man on each arm. The man on her left let go only long enough to open the school door. He then took her frail hand as she laboriously navigated the step up and in.
As they waited with her in line to vote, she started a conversation with a couple of her friends who had gotten to the polls a few minutes before her. The two friends said they would wait for her afterward. With great dignity, they hobbled along with their canes toward a few chairs along the wall.
The three women sat together and visited quietly while keeping an eye out as for who had made it to the polls. Just a glance into their eyes told quite a story.
For those eyes had seen lynchings. And those feet that now needed a cane had marched. The arms that had been supported to reach the polls had been linked together in solidarity in standing for justice. They'd sat at the lunch counters and in the front of the bus. They knew what fire hoses and police dogs and night sticks could do. That day they remembered what they had been through and marked some of the fruits of their sufferings.
The men who had driven her hadn't voted. They loitered in a corner. If they even hinted at being impatient or wanting get back to their other dealings, one brief look shot across the room from her put an immediate end to it.
When I look at my role in building His kingdom of righteousness, peace, and joy, I'd like to say that I'm like one of those elderly women. Truthfully, though, I must confess my solidarity is more often with the men who were with her.
I don't clearly see or understand or begin to appreciate the sacrifices and suffering that have made it possible to fulfill my calling in His work. Be it the saints of old or people who currently give beyond their means to make sure that I have a salary, it's often lost on me.
Plus I know that there are material and emotional benefits if I deal only in the portions of the Gospel that are the opiate of the masses rather than getting fully engaged in the cause of Peaceable Kingdom. It's easier to surround myself with material possessions that show my status to others (though mostly to convince myself of my own worth) rather than to go through the hardships it takes to bring worth and dignity and justice to others.
And if I can't get my head and heart lined up around these things, how can I possibly even begin to pretend to understand the cross?
But once in a while I hear the Story again. And as I do I'm reminded that His work is not just something from the past or for the future but is for the here and now.
So I have a choice each day. I can treat Him with respect and honor. It may be a bit inconvenient and I might get impatient but for it I'll be blessed. Or, I can pay the price of joining with Him in the task of building His kingdom in the here and now. The cause is His. The choice is mine.
Your cause be mine, great Lord divine.
Your aim be my ambition:
For wasted is my greatest strength
Unless it find expression
In love the gives itself away,
In life responsive to obey
The terms of Your commission. (Bryan Jeffery Leach)
Friday, October 8, 2010
Tables
Even before kids arrived we knew there wouldn't be room for them. The young adults on a mission trip who were in charge of Bible School that August took up most of the space in the tiny storefront. We would need to move most of our activities at the end of the block in the park.
The day before our festivities were to begin, we all walked down the street to scope out how to get the kids safely across the street and to determine where we would need to haul tables and chairs each day.
When we arrived we were pleasantly surprised to find several brand new heavy duty wooden picnic tables with attached benches. They were right under the trees where we were thinking of setting up our tables. They hadn't been there the day before. None of the neighbors noticed anyone delivering them and they were just as surprised to see them as we were.
Bible School flew by. We had bunches of kids. Many of those kids were new to the congregation. The young adults on their mission trip lead great lessons and activities. We even had one person find a grocer who provided lunch for all the kids each day. Those new tables got a good workout. They couldn't have been more perfect.
Though Bible School ended on Friday, the young adults still had one day left in town. We decided to spend Saturday cleaning up an empty lot.
So it was early on Saturday morning when we noticed it. The tables were gone. No one, including the neighbors whose houses face the park, saw them removed. They somehow appeared in time for Bible School and vanished as soon as it was over.
We never saw signs of those tables again.
Lord, surprise me today with Your mercy and care and blessing. May I revel in Your mysterious ways while I witness of and delight in You.
The day before our festivities were to begin, we all walked down the street to scope out how to get the kids safely across the street and to determine where we would need to haul tables and chairs each day.
When we arrived we were pleasantly surprised to find several brand new heavy duty wooden picnic tables with attached benches. They were right under the trees where we were thinking of setting up our tables. They hadn't been there the day before. None of the neighbors noticed anyone delivering them and they were just as surprised to see them as we were.
Bible School flew by. We had bunches of kids. Many of those kids were new to the congregation. The young adults on their mission trip lead great lessons and activities. We even had one person find a grocer who provided lunch for all the kids each day. Those new tables got a good workout. They couldn't have been more perfect.
Though Bible School ended on Friday, the young adults still had one day left in town. We decided to spend Saturday cleaning up an empty lot.
So it was early on Saturday morning when we noticed it. The tables were gone. No one, including the neighbors whose houses face the park, saw them removed. They somehow appeared in time for Bible School and vanished as soon as it was over.
We never saw signs of those tables again.
Lord, surprise me today with Your mercy and care and blessing. May I revel in Your mysterious ways while I witness of and delight in You.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Boards
Fresh new boards covered the windows and doors of the house. The old boards had been there a long time.
I remember when we were looking for a place to live in the neighborhood seeing this house. It was boarded up then but still appeared in good condition. It's on the quietest street in our neighborhood. The houses on either side of it are in excellent condition. It's the only house on that block that I've ever seen boarded up. The owner was not interested in selling it back then and must not be wanting to now, either.
So there are fresh boards on the house. Though they're better than the old boards which had begun to rot, the house is still a board-up.
It's hard for me to understand why someone would keep a house boarded up for so long. They could live in it or rent it or sell it. Certainly there's something useful they could do with it rather than just reboard the windows and doors every couple of decades.
Then again, I do understand a bit about keeping things boarded up.
I have places inside me that I don't want to deal with that I've kept boarded up for years. There are dark corners full of grime and pain and resentment and things I've completely forgotten about that I don't want to see. Even when I get a chance to go in and try to clean things out I prefer to instead put new boards up and move along to more pleasant areas.
And I want God to respect the boards, too. Yes, I know that the Spirit will bring new life to all areas I let Him in. But I've had Him work on so much of me that I know His remodeling projects can take a long time and are often painful. Though I am absolutely sure the results of His presence will bring life, I just don't want to deal with the process.
So guarding the boarded up doors becomes as important as the boards themselves.
There are no signs from the city on the house. Yet, for all practical purposes, even with the new boards this house is condemned. John 3:18 reminds us that I don't need to have someone spray paint the word "condemned" on the parts of my life where I lack trust in the Savior; that message is self-inflicted.
I fantasize that God would work like they do on the television show "Extreme Makeover - Home Edition." I could invite Him in, He'd send me to Disney World for a week, and then I could come back with all my old junk removed and a new life in front of me.
But He want me to pick up a hammer, too, and take ownership of the process.
When I've done so in the past -- when I've taken down the boards and let Him remodel other areas of my life -- I've received nothing less than an abundance of joy and peace as a result.
So somewhere deep inside me there's a hope that I'll work up the courage and strength to remove the boards on those portions of my life that I haven't yet given completely to Him. Then, by His grace, we'll enter into the next episode of "Extreme Makeover" in my life.
Let your mercy and grace flow, Lord. Let your light shine in my darkness and let me live in the fullness of Your presence.
I remember when we were looking for a place to live in the neighborhood seeing this house. It was boarded up then but still appeared in good condition. It's on the quietest street in our neighborhood. The houses on either side of it are in excellent condition. It's the only house on that block that I've ever seen boarded up. The owner was not interested in selling it back then and must not be wanting to now, either.
So there are fresh boards on the house. Though they're better than the old boards which had begun to rot, the house is still a board-up.
It's hard for me to understand why someone would keep a house boarded up for so long. They could live in it or rent it or sell it. Certainly there's something useful they could do with it rather than just reboard the windows and doors every couple of decades.
Then again, I do understand a bit about keeping things boarded up.
I have places inside me that I don't want to deal with that I've kept boarded up for years. There are dark corners full of grime and pain and resentment and things I've completely forgotten about that I don't want to see. Even when I get a chance to go in and try to clean things out I prefer to instead put new boards up and move along to more pleasant areas.
And I want God to respect the boards, too. Yes, I know that the Spirit will bring new life to all areas I let Him in. But I've had Him work on so much of me that I know His remodeling projects can take a long time and are often painful. Though I am absolutely sure the results of His presence will bring life, I just don't want to deal with the process.
So guarding the boarded up doors becomes as important as the boards themselves.
There are no signs from the city on the house. Yet, for all practical purposes, even with the new boards this house is condemned. John 3:18 reminds us that I don't need to have someone spray paint the word "condemned" on the parts of my life where I lack trust in the Savior; that message is self-inflicted.
I fantasize that God would work like they do on the television show "Extreme Makeover - Home Edition." I could invite Him in, He'd send me to Disney World for a week, and then I could come back with all my old junk removed and a new life in front of me.
But He want me to pick up a hammer, too, and take ownership of the process.
When I've done so in the past -- when I've taken down the boards and let Him remodel other areas of my life -- I've received nothing less than an abundance of joy and peace as a result.
So somewhere deep inside me there's a hope that I'll work up the courage and strength to remove the boards on those portions of my life that I haven't yet given completely to Him. Then, by His grace, we'll enter into the next episode of "Extreme Makeover" in my life.
Let your mercy and grace flow, Lord. Let your light shine in my darkness and let me live in the fullness of Your presence.
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