Terminal

He lamented the same topic each time we visited. His girlfriend had a terminal illness.

I never met his girlfriend; I never knew her name. I don't know where she lived, though he was basically homeless so I'm not sure how that all worked anyway. Occasionally he would ask that I remember her in prayer.

The thing with her illness was that, though there was no cure, her death from it was not expected any time soon. In fact, the disease didn't have a direct obvious impact on her physical well being. She was in the very early stages of this slowly progressing illness and the doctors had predicted it would have minimal impact on her for the next 10 years. The prognosis was for gradual decline after that. Since she was already in her late 50s, with mindful monitoring she would most likely live for what most people would consider a full life.

None of this seemed to matter to him, though. The fact that she had a terminal illness obsessed his mind and depleted his well-being.

One day as he again lamented about the situation, I turned to him and was surprised to hear the following statement come out of my mouth:

"You know, we're all terminal. She just knows what from."

He gave me an odd look and changed the topic of conversation.

I saw him again about a week later. He looked about 2 inches taller and 10 years younger. His demeanor, actions, and conversation were filled with a new vitality. In our visits from that time forward he no longer obsessed about the terminal nature of his girlfriend's illness. He would occasionally mention that her illness was terminal but always followed it with a grin and the words, " . . . but, we all are."

That little statement changed his life for the better. When I remember it my life is better, too.

There are only a few material things like pyramids and Great Walls and Colosseums that have survived the ages and they're mostly in some state of ruin. Virtually all of the music ever composed or words ever written will never be heard again. The churches that Paul helped establish are not mega-churches or beacons of Christianity today.

Some might find that depressing. For me it's a relief. It takes the pressure off of me and reorders priorities. Sermons and public prayers change from speaking words today for all eternity to speaking eternal words for today. Building a church that will endure changes from setting things up now that will be right forever to forever setting things up that will be right for now.

Ministry comes not in monuments but in moments, and moments are fleeting. We're all terminal; our works, our ideas, our selves.

And just once in a while I have a day when I'm not obsessively lamenting that fact. It's then that I can let the One who was and is and is to come fully invade and embrace His terminal creation known as me, bringing with Him into this fleeting moment the vitality of His everlasting life.

Thank you, God, for each moment. Free me from my focus on the temporary to live fully in Your presence.